As you will be aware, all memes ask very dull questions that no one cares about the answers to, mostly regarding favourite colours and the like. This one is different. It has added juice.
I give you...
The Deep Down n Dirty Meme
- Biggest fear:
- Most meglomanical ambition:
- When you’re talking to your boss, you’re usually thinking about:
- Most disgusting habit:
- Criteria for judging other people:
- How do you measure up?:
- What do you think when you see a fat person eating fast food?:
- How about when you see thin person smoking?:
- When you meet someone of the same gender who’s more attractive than you, inside you think:
- When you meet someone of the opposite gender who’s less attractive than you, inside you think:
- The last lie you told was:
- Tell us about the time you read someone’s diary/hacked into their emails/went through their stuff:
- You know that person who you’re secretly jealous of - and there’s a part of you, that you can’t quite suppress, that wishes they would, just for once, get to taste a bit of your luck? Tell us what you hate about them – go on let it all out:
- The most expensive thing you’ve ever stolen was:
- Even though all this is true, you’re still a really good person because…
I'm going to tag Caroline, Moon Topples, Steg, Damian, Atyllah, and Silver Tiger. Obviously, feel free not to do it - if you're too scared.
Are you brave enough?
*Update*
OK, OK:
- Biggest fear: Death. Or getting close to the end of my life and looking back and finding I wasted it.
- Most meglomanical ambition: You know how you get these ‘rock star’ comedians now who fill stadiums and stuff? I dream of being a rock star author. Haven’t quite decided how that would work yet, but it would definitely be cool.
- When you’re talking to your boss, you’re usually thinking: “Can’t you just send me the cheque without me having to do the work?”
- Most disgusting habit: I fart quite a lot, possibly because I don't eat meat. Instead of being embarrassed about this I think it’s funny. Blokes love it. In my mind.
- Criteria for judging other people: How long have you got? Tone of voice, facial expression, posture, choice of words, eye contact, clothes, friends, whether they buy me drinks… Sometimes I even listen to the content of what they’re saying.
- How do you measure up?: Average.
- What do you think when you see a fat person eating fast food?: If I’m feeling thin – ‘please don’t do that to yourself’. If I’m feeling fat – ‘get a grip and sort your life out’.
- How about when you see thin person smoking?: If I’m feeling thin – ‘please don’t do that to yourself’. If I’m feeling fat – ‘get a grip and sort your life out’. (See what I did there?)
- When you meet someone of the same gender who’s more attractive than you, inside you think: You'd better not be funnier than me.
- When you meet someone of the opposite gender who’s less attractive than you, inside you think: You’d better be funnier than me.
- The last lie you told was: When I said I was working on my novel again in Saturday’s post. I haven’t actually started working on it again yet. I am going to though. Just as soon as I’ve finished the important business here. Sorry guys.
- Tell us about the time you read someone’s diary/hacked into their emails/went through their stuff: It was reassuring and yet strangely disappointing. I’m probably not as ashamed of it as I should be.
- You know that person who you’re secretly jealous of - and there’s a part of you, that you can’t quite suppress, that wishes they would, just for once, get to taste a bit of your luck? Tell us what you hate about them – go on let it all out: OK, so she’s got more talent, friends, tenacity, money, moral integrity, social skills, and is generally a nicer person than me... But who's got the cutest butt, eh? Who's the daddy now? *Inner cry*
- The most expensive thing you’ve ever stolen was: I used to enjoy a bit of good clean shoplifting as a youth. I think a bottle of perfume was probably the most expensive item I thieved. I had no conscience about it at all. Don’t you just love teenagers?
- Even though all this is true, you’re still a really good person because… See question 13.
Happy? Now it's definitely your turn.
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22 comments:
Biggest fear:
Clowns, midget, midget clowns
Most meglomanical ambition:
Still planning on taking over the world despite laziness and previous thwarting
When you’re talking to your boss, you’re usually thinking about:
pie
Most disgusting habit:
going out in public
Criteria for judging other people:
looks, money, whether they're clowns, midget or midgets clowns, are they of any value to me, can I beat them up
How do you measure up?:
Yes, no, no, no, no, not really, yes
What do you think when you see a fat person eating fast food?:
I must move that mirror
How about when you see thin person smoking?:
Die, die, die
When you meet someone of the same gender who’s more attractive than you, inside you think:
gay
When you meet someone of the opposite gender who’s less attractive than you, inside you think:
gay
The last lie you told was:
the last time I spoke
Tell us about the time you read someone’s diary/hacked into their emails/went through their stuff:
I used to work in IT and had to do 'security' audits, so I would pick on people I suspected of being clowns, midgets, in love with me, and fake a reason for auditing them.
You know that person who you’re secretly jealous of - and there’s a part of you, that you can’t quite suppress, that wishes they would, just for once, get to taste a bit of your luck? Tell us what you hate about them – go on let it all out:
The problem is, I actually hate everyone, hence world domination plans, because everyone seems to have it that little bit better than me. Apart from people who blog, hence why I read blogs. However, once the world is mine, I intend, person by person, to extract the pleasure from their lives, little by little, until they're as bitter, emotionally shrivelled and bewhiskered as me. However, Sandra Bullock, Michelle Trachtenber and Julia Stiles will be kept in see through, person sized, biospheres in a prettypeoplezoo until they are of no further use to me.
The most expensive thing you’ve ever stolen was:
some really, really, really good acid. And a motorbike. Which I needed in order to get away with the acid.
Even though all this is true, you’re still a really good person because…
no, I'm not, and have never been under any illusions to the contrary. But at least I let people know this fairly early on in any kind of relationship, so when I revert to type, they've only got themselves to blame
One problem sweetie.
Memememememes tend to be completed first by their maker.
After you dearest ...
x
(yes I am scared ... trembling indeed).
Metal4Life: LOL. Brilliant. Thanks for being the first person to have a go! If you want to post your answers on your blog I'll add a link to the post.
Caroline: Oh god, really? I'm a journalist, I'm used to asking the searching questions - answering them is way out of my comfort zone! Perhaps I'll give it a go later.
Your wish etc;
http://ascandalandadisgrace.blogspot.com/2007/03/deep-down-n-dirty-meme.html
Hey Julia. I meant to comment last week - CONGRATU-DIDDLY-LATIONS on the agent thingy! I really hope that things start racing forward for you and your novel! Again, congratulations!
Now.. Meme wise.. I think I'll have a go.
Cheers.
1. My biggest fear is running out of money.
2. I don't have any ambitions, megalomanic or other. I used to have ambitions but then I grew up.
3. I don't have a boss but when I did I used to think "I'm glad I don't have your job!"
4. None of my habits seem disgusting to me or I wouldn't have them. So you're asking which of my habits other people find disgusting. How would I know? Licking my plate in the restaurant seemed to embarrass my previous partner. Tigger's too laidback to be fazed by such things.
5. Do I like them or do they annoy me?
6. I think I'm pretty wonderful.
7. Not much, really. People can do what they like as long as it doesn't bother me.
8. I hope s/he keeps down-wind of me. Looking forward to July 1st. (Smoking ban starts in "enclosed public places.")
9. How would I know whether someone of the same gender is more or less attractive than me? There are nice people and nasty people. I prefer the nice people.
10. I would never make such a judgement of someone. Anyone can be attractive. It only takes the mood and the occasion.
11. I don't remember. I was brought up by a strict mother and thus discovered early that lying is a tool like any other.
12. Funnily enough, other people's privacy is one of the few things I have any respect for.
13. I discovered fairly early that the person I most liked being was myself (see 6). I therefore don't envy anyone. Everyone has problems. Why should I want someone else's problems when I have more than enough fun with my own?
14. Pass.
15. It wouldn't occur to me to consider myself a good person. We're all a mixture of motivations and what is good and bad is a matter of opinion. I find myself good company most of the time.
SilverTiger
Metal4Life: Cheers, I'll link you up in a bit...
Kate: Thanks! Glad you're doing the meme, looking forward to your answers.
SilverTiger: Geez, you are one helluva nice person! If everyone else comes out sounding as good as that I'm going to feel like a right bitch! Maybe I should've been a bit less honest there... Oh well, I'll still have the butt.
bugger!
;-)
Interesting! You are all brave. (Is farting as good as it gets?!!)
Julia: I'll do this tonight. I expect I'll have it posted before you wake up in the morning. Unless I decide I'm too frightened, that is...
That's a really amusing post and all but...I guess I'm old-fashioned - no, I am old-fashioned - but I just wish you hadn't told us about the farting. I guess it's the modern way. I wonder if Jane Austen farted and got so much pleasure out of it. Depends on her diet I guess.
Julia: I have completed the task.
Well, sort of...
I'll do it in the morning.
Promise.
Never mind all that. Where did you get the word meme from in this sense? I've only ever seen it before in books by Richard Dawkins to describe the cultural equivalent of a gene. (But then I've lived a sheltered life.)
I did it! Check it out on my blog if you want
Done, as promised!
Scared? Me? You trying to call me chicken...? Ha!
I will post it on my blog tomorrow! Read it if you dare...
Thanks for doing the meme everyone - hope you enjoyed it. The fascist filters on my connection blocked most of them, so I haven't been able to leave comments on your blogs. Really sorry about that. I have read them all though - for some reason I can still view them in Technorati.
Mother of invention: Well, there's motorbike theft and bedwetting on a couple of the others - is that hardcore enough for ya! ;-)
Baralbion: Not sure where the term comes from, it's in pretty common usage on blogs - which I obviously spend far too much time looking at!
Atyallah: Now I'm scared! But I'll be reading it anyway...
Re item 11:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9YJUUeo1V1A
Re #1 - they are my fears too, exactly.
I have done the meme and posted it on my journal.
1. Biggest fear: I am a non-discriminating fearer; I fear everything--wholly.
2. Most meglomanical ambition: I want one person who isn't totally annoyed by me to hide me away and be available to hold me whenever I need it. I am really afraid of excessive money or attention. This is a stupid answer. My apologies.
3. When you’re talking to your boss, you’re usually thinking about: I don't have a boss. I don't have a job. Come to think of it, I don't really have a life. I'm in school, so if my male professors speak to me, I am usually daydreaming about doing naughty things with them so they'll get fired from their stupid Christian university teaching jobs. It's for their own good.
4. Most disgusting habit: Eating my fingers. (Followed closely by eating gratuitous amounts of cheese...)
5. Criteria for judging other people: First, I consider the condition of their teeth; second, I consider their intellect.
6. How do you measure up?: Not outstandingly.
7. What do you think when you see a fat person eating fast food?: Food allergies suck unattractive body parts; I want Taco Bell, too...
8. How about when you see a thin person smoking?: There is no amount of pretty or skinny that can compensate for perpetual bad breath.
9. When you meet someone of the same gender who’s more attractive than you, inside you think: If I stopped to think every time I saw someone who I thought was prettier than I am, I would never get anywhere.
10. When you meet someone of the opposite gender who’s less attractive than you, inside you think: I can always find something redeeming in men...Unless they have bad teeth... Then I have to disengage... Immediately.
11. The last lie you told was: I told someone I didn't hear the Fed-Ex guy buzz (I didn't want to go downstairs in a tank top).
12. Tell us about the time you read someone’s diary/hacked into their emails/went through their stuff: I rummaged through a girl's bathroom cabinet to see what kinds of dirty things she had (she was a filthy stripper girl who told wild stories of winning thong contests). I was so disappointed--even her condoms were boring.
13. You know that person who you’re secretly jealous of - and there’s a part of you, that you can’t quite suppress, that wishes they would, just for once, get to taste a bit of your luck? Tell us what you hate about them – go on let it all out: There is no one that I am not envious of in some regard; I hope you all burn. Jerks.
14. The most expensive thing you’ve ever stolen was: Unsuspecting boys' hearts; everyone pays when this happens.
15. Even though all this is true, you’re still a really good person because… Um. I never claimed I was a good person. If I told a lie that big, it would cause me to burst into flames leaving behind only a pile of scorched clothing.
Baron Hashbrown: Brilliant video - if a bit close to the bone... Like the new pic. Not exactly the way I'd pictured you! You're clearly full of surprises.
Media Bunny: Thanks Bun, nice answers.
Minty: Thanks! Re #2 - I don't think it's a stupid answer at all. I'm strangely afraid of too much money as well. I'm kind of scared of being too successful. I suppose it's just a fear of change really - I don't know who I'd be if I was rich. Me still, I hope. But you don't really know unless it happens do you?
Sorry for taking so long to reply to you guys, it's all been a bit manic lately.
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